修.坏

“坏了,看能不能修一修?”

望去,只见父母正严肃地讨论着眼前的插座。

“其实,也不贵。我们为什么不买个新的?”我终于控制不住自己的嘴巴,问了他们。

妈立刻皱眉头,想也不想就说:“明明就还有两个还能用,为什么要因为一个就把它丢了?”

“它已经坏了,你只能修好,不可能再修坏呀!不修修看,你又知道它没救了?”老豆呵呵地笑道。

于是,我们动手把它一片一片地拆开。

其实,我们对待坏了的东西的态度,和人与人之间的态度相近。

父母那一辈的人,总想着可以修,可以补。对待事情时,他们总觉得有得补救,天无绝人之路。

至少努力过了,就像那个插座一样,坏了,也只能选择看开。一个坏了,还有两个能用也不错。他们的乐天派,和我们的完美派形成了强烈的对比。

如果是我,我会毫不犹豫地把插座扔了。因为它不完美。

自己写的,只要觉得感觉不到位,便会一字不漏地把它删了。

人,一旦疏远,就会替自己想个借口,把他过去的好与坏都删除、忘却。

都只怪自己不够好。

常常把自己逼入死角。

偶尔,世界用巧妙的方法提醒你,你虽然不完美,但也还是很不错。

You are imperfect, but enough.

And that’s enough for me.

Gasping for air.

DSC_6035es1

For a long long time, I’ve avoided this.

But as I powered it on today, my heart wrenched with emotions.

The slow whirring; like it’s gasping for air whilst trying to do what I command of it.

Each click is a keen reminder of the virtue of patience; a long pause ensues before anything pops up. Even after it does, it takes a long long time before I get to start typing and proding the keys to fire it up.

It is difficult.

Not my laptop, but my emotions.

It’s like watching someone gasping for air, struggling as they work.

It’s not just someone, it’s akin to watching an old friend, dying right before your eyes.

Sometimes, I wonder how in the world do I get so emotionally attached to objects. It has been difficult for me to come to terms that I require a new laptop, now that my old friend is evidently dying a slow death.

This year marks the 8th that we spent together.

8 long years.

I am sorry that you’re suffering and I can’t seem to make it better.

I am sorry, and thank you.